Fantasy Mission Force
(1982)
Director:
Chu Yin
Ping
Cast: Jimmy Wang Yu, Jackie Chan, Chan Ling
If it sounds ridiculous, that's only because it was.
- Jackie Chan on Fantasy Mission Force
It is the middle of World War II, and things are looking
grim for the
Allies. In the far north of Canada, in an unusually warm area full of
foliage,
a platoon of Japanese soldiers have attacked an Allied base. The
Japanese soldiers
make quick work, blasting the crap out of the base, killing the
allied soldiers, and capturing several Allied generals - including
generals
"Abraham Lincoln", "Robert Forster", and an African general who looks
remarkably
like an Asian in blackface. The Allied generals are then taken to
Luxembourg,
to be held there temporarily by Japanese Nazis before they are to be
taken
to Japan for questioning.
The news of this puts the rest of the Allied command in
an uproar. Obviously,
a rescue mission must be put forward to save these generals. But who
will
lead the rescue mission? The generals consider possible candidates via
a slide show. They first consider James Bond, but he's away in South
Africa.
Escape
From New York's Snake Plissken (here called "Snake King") would
also be a serious candidate, but they mention he's been dead for three
years. "The Bald Detective", Karl Maka's character from the Aces
Go Places (a.k.a. Mad Mission) movie series, is
a
no-no, because he has defected to the enemy. They also consider Rocky
Balboa
for a second, but quickly realize he's a boxer, not a soldier. So they
settle for Don Lin, a renegade lieutenant who is first seen driving a
brand
new Suzuki jeep into a battlefield, driving with one hand and casually
machine-gunning a platoon of attacking soldiers with the other hand.
So you think you have an idea of how crazy Fantasy
Mission Force
is?
Uh-uh. My friend, you haven't begun to comprehend just how wacko,
illogical,
insane, ludicrous, jaw-dropping, and other similar adjectives this
movie
is. Just when you think the movie is going to follow some kind of
pattern
- already illogical, but some kind of pattern - screeech! the movie
takes
a different bend, by fitting elements of another genre or time period
into
the jumble. It may not seem like it makes sense, but in its attempt to
have absolutely no kind of logic, the movie quickly does become, in a
twisted
way, logical. We become prepared for whatever new demented angle the
movie
throws at us - in fact, we'd be surprised if several minutes went by
and
nothing
bizarre
happened.
For example, take the scene after the heroes are
captured by Amazon
warriors living on the battlefield, shown to the Amazon leader (a suave
man wearing a tuxedo), and then imprisoned. The female member of the
heroes
quickly makes her escape - which is done to the music from John
Carpenter's
Halloween.
Yes, Halloween. Somehow it seems appropriate for the
scene.
There's a lot of music in this movie that seems to be ripped off from
other
movies. There's a lot of spaghetti western-sounding music here, with a
melancholy-sounding harmonica rendering of "Camptown Races" played
during
the more serious scenes (relatively speaking). One other piece of music
I recognized was the Ennio Morricone-penned music from the Italian
suspense
thriller Investigation Of A Citizen Above Suspicion.
Listening
to the music by itself, one would think that it could only be used for
an opening credits setpiece to set the mood, or for a particularly
tense
scene. But in Fantasy Mission Force, this music is
"borrowed"
to score the scene where Jackie Chan's character gets into a slapstick
kung-fu/wrestling tournament fight. Now, before seeing this movie, I
would
have never thought Morricone's score could be used for any
fight scene. But somehow it works here.
Speaking of Jackie Chan, Fantasy Mission Force
has been
resurrected and repackaged as a Jackie Chan movie, no doubt because of
Jackie Chan's subsequent rise in popularity in North America. Viewers,
however, who are expecting a typical Jackie Chan movie, or at least
Jackie
Chan in a starring role, will be disappointed. That's mainly because
Chan
(here billed as "Jacky Chan") only has a supporting role that's
barely more than a cameo - he wanders in and out through the entire
movie.
Chan only was in this movie because he owed Jimmy Wang Yu a favor. So
this
movie isn't "a Jackie Chan" movie in any sense. In his few scenes,
Jackie
does do some of his familiar light- hearted gymnastics and kung-fu, and
they are entertaining in their own right, though this material isn't as
big a scale as in his later movies like Police Force (a.k.a.
Police
Story) or Project A. He is also blessed with the
last few lines of dialogue in the movie, which are so unintentionally
funny,
I won't spoil them here. Despite this, I am sure some people renting
this
movie were very angry, expecting one thing and getting something else.
However, for those knowing that this isn't a typical
Jackie Chan movie,
and familiar with the excesses Hong Kong cinema is sometimes guilty of,
they are more likely to have a blast with this movie, like I did.
Judging
the acting of a movie like this is pretty much useless - everyone is
dubbed,
except for the musical (!) number near the beginning of the movie.
("Ha-ha-ha!"
are the only lyrics I could understand of the number, and they are
uttered
several times in the number.) And judging the movie by the script is
really
redundant in a movie like this - you either "get it" or not. Tell me,
do
any of the following scene descriptions sound appealing to you?:
- A rip-off of the drinking scene from Raiders of
the Lost Ark,
where the contestants not only have to drink, but shoot off an article
of clothing from a tied-up woman after finishing their glass.
- A woman who decides to leave her home forever, but not
before blowing
it up with a bazooka in an especially tender moment.
- Speeded-up footage of a marching platoon of kilt-clad
Asian soldiers,
doing their speeded-up march to bagpipe music.
- One of the heroes is dressed up in medieval armor, and
swings a morning
star.
- A battle with a gang straight out of The Road
Warrior,
with extra warriors riding the tops of the cars like the worm riders
from
Dune.
Mix the above with a large dose of slapstick, some
kung-fu, gymnastics,
wirework, and some scenes of surprising violence (both in scale and
intensity),
and you get Fantasy Mission Force - an absolutely
unique
movie, even if some of its details are obviously derivative from other
sources. Of course, this movie will not be to everyone's taste, and I
certainly
wouldn't use it as an introduction to Hong Kong cinema. But for those
familiar
with the genre, or open enough to a wide range of movies, their chances
of enjoying Fantasy Mission Force are greatly
increased. (Note:
Some video distributors have used substandard prints for the video
editions,
so beware.)
Check for availability on Amazon (VHS)
Check for availability on Amazon (DVD)
Check Amazon for Jackie Chan's autobiography "I Am Jackie Chan"
See also: Bridge Of Dragons,
For Your Height Only, Didn't You Hear
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