The Last Marshal
(1999)
Director:
Mike
Kirton
Cast: Scott Glenn, Constance Marie, Randall Batinkoff
We first see Marshal McClary (Glenn) on his ranch
shortly after the
opening title, which spells "marshal" with two Ls despite it being
spelled
with only one L all over the video box. The marshal comes across two
people
sleeping on his property in front of a fire, so he naturally puts one
of
their feet on the fire, resulting in them waking up pretty quickly.
Pointing
his gun, the marshal yells, "Whatever you're reaching for better be a
chicken
burrito, Pepe!" Next, he tells these "border shit maggots" that, "First
off, you've done a s**t load wrong, because you're a f**king wetback
Mexican
on private property! Second, I do have the the damn right, because it's
my property and I hate Mexicans!" When one of the men mentions they are
actually Sioux, the marshal responds by saying, "Well, you're really up
s**t creek, Chief!" Whoa! No, we're certainly not in PC
territory
here, and neither elsewhere in the movie, with McCalry using any excuse
to express, with most colorful language, his instant hatred of everyone
he
comes across. And any situation where he is able to use his fists or
pistols
is okay by him.
A famous French film director once said that making a
movie can be the
best way to criticize another movie; compare this movie to the awful Outlaw
Force, and you start to see his point. The makers of this
movie
certainly knew what people expect of this kind of movie, clearly making
a real effort to pull it off, which they overall do successfully. They
knew the key to a movie like this is in the kind of hero, though maybe
the best way to describe it here would be "anti-hero". Casting Scott
Glenn
as this title figure was a masterstroke, for he plays the role as if he
was written for him. With his rugged looks sporting a bushy mustache,
and
wearing a cowboy hat and jeans, his character indeed looks like he is
from
Texas. Glenn is also successful in his acting to convince us his
character
is a real Texan, no doubt due to the fact the script makes him possibly
the meanest, most foul-mouthed Texan lawman to walk the streets.
Marshal
McClary makes Chuck Norris' character from Walker: Texas Ranger look
like a real pansy. The morning after that fireside incident, McClary
says
to a fellow officer about his Latino wife, "Well, at least your house
is
clean." When they arrive outside a church, with gunmen holding the
churchgoers
inside, McClary decides he has to kill the creeps, because the FBI
hostage
negotiators are only 10 minutes away. Storming in, he immediately
starts
blasting away the creeps with his shotgun, spouting off various
profanity
laced insults while painting the walls red. As you may have guessed by
now, this guy isn't exactly subtle.
Due to the FBI interfering with his perfect plans,
McClary ends up wounded,
and two of the gunmen get away. After some investigating, McClary finds
they escaped to Miami ("Faggot Central"), so still sporting his cowboy
duds, heads down there to find them. Met at the Miami train station by
another marshal, McClary's first words to him are, "Who the f**k are
you?"
This brings up one of the reasons why I enjoyed The Last Marshal
so
much - the script is so ridiculously filled up with profanity, viewers
will be amused rather than offended. About every second or third line
of
dialogue Glenn utters has some kind of profanity in it. And he isn't
the
only one uttering gratuitous and hilarious profanities; he and other
characters
throughout the film spit out lines like, "It wasn't that he s**t his
pants
- it was the way he s**t his pants." , "I get emotional around
water.
It scares the s**t out of me.", and "Lick the back of my b***s!"
There are a few instances where the writing gets
seriously screwed up,
mentioning the situation of something, then mentioning it very
differently
later. One typical occurrence is that we first learn McClary will
retire
in six months, then later someone mentions it is ten months. I
can't
imagine how the director could have missed something like that, and I
have
to wonder if the script was being worked on as it was being filmed. As
well, the writing doesn't really take the story or the characters in
any
directions we haven't seen before. For example, when the water phobic
McClary
is given a crash course in piloting a powerboat by a female marshal, we
instantly know that McClary will find himself having to drive a boat
before
the end of the movie. And, of course, that female marshal is non
Caucasian,
and McClary was forced to partner up with her by the higher powers. I
consider
stuff like that part of the game, and kind of fun, at least when they
are
found in a formula that is well executed. The Last Marshal is
very well made, with slick cinematography, and with tongue-in-cheek
writing
and acting. It's main promise of hard action is also delivered, enough
so that it becomes quite violent. Dead bodies are pumped with extra
bullets
to make sure the corpses are indeed dead, and a surprising number of
innocent
bystanders get knocked off in a couple of shoot-out scenes. Those
shoot-outs
are very well choreographed, managing to bring a sense of chaos,
while at the same time being easy to follow and filled with gusto.
There
are also a couple of chase sequences that are equally as noteworthy.
One
of these chases, involving a powerboat chasing a motorcycle, manages to
get these incredibly fast machines close together in the same shot -
quite
an achievement for a low budget movie.
Eventually, the movie starts to drag a little -
McClary's foul speaking
doesn't seem as funny as it was in the beginning, and the pacing starts
to slow down considerably enough that at one point, they have to get
McClary
to coincidentally bump into one of the bad guys on the street. The
movie
does redeem itself a lot by packing in a considerable amount of action
towards the end, leading to a satisfying (though a little sadistic)
ending.
If you are looking for a macho actioner to watch while you and your
buddies
crush beer cans on you heads, this movie will do nicely, and I was
pretty
satisfied by it. In fact, if they could construct a more evenly paced
story,
and deliver the goods at the same quality, I wouldn't mind at all if
they
had this character strap on his six-shooters again.
Check for availability on Amazon (VHS)
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See also: If You Meet
Sartana..., Outlaw Force, The Stalking Moon
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