Rumpelstiltskin
(1996)
Director: Mark
Jones
Cast: Kim Johnston Ulrich, Max Grodenchik
From the director of Leprechaun comes
another tale of a small
mythical creature brought into modern times. Leprechaun
was a dreary
movie, saved from total disaster by an enthusiastic and occasional
performance
by Warwick Davis. Rumpelstiltskin doesn't have Davis.
The title creature is first seen in a prologue based on
the fairy tale,
being chased by the usual pack of villagers with burning torches after
trying to get a baby from a woman he gave a favor to. He is cursed by
the
village witch, who is kind enough to admit that the curse (turning him
into a small statue) she is using can be broken under certain
circumstances.
Cut to modern day L.A., where Ulrich is a recently widowed mother who
is
taken by her goofy best friend to an antique store (cobwebs,
crazy
proprietor) that only exists in "B" movies. Yes, you can guess what she
finds and buys. Unconsciously wishing for a visit from her dead husband
while holding the statue, Rumpelstilskin is brought back to life. After
granting her wish, he demands her baby.
Rumpelstilskin is quite a character. He is several times
referred to
as "short", though any viewer will notice that the actor is in a squat
throughout the picture. He seems to be patterned after Freddy Krueger,
with wisecracks like "I love it when a plan comes together!" (from The
A-Team) and "This chariot has a lot of horses!" while he drives a
tanker
in a sequence rip-off from Duel.. Never is it explained how
Rumpelstilskin
is so quick to adjust to 20th century culture and make topical
references.
When you ask yourself questions like that while watching
a movie, you
know it's in trouble. Other questions came up like: If he can kill from
long distances, why does he do this only once, and then not kill the
mother
and the obnoxious TV host who helps her try to recover he baby? And why
does he kill the other victims face-to-face when they are managing to
hurt
him before their deaths? If you were going to bail out someone from
jail,
would you decide to take a nap outside the police station first? And
how
is Rumpelstiltskin able to drive that tanker and a motorcycle so
easily?
Even in the technical department, the movie is in bad
shape. Although
the make-up for the character Rumpelstiltskin is acceptably done, the
various
gore effects, burnings etc. are sub par for the genre. The movie is
also
poorly directed and edited - there is one murder of a police officer
that I can't figure out how was done. (It's possible the movie
was cut to get an "R" rating.). Photography is sometimes murky, and
occasionally
has spots on the screen - signs that the movie was shelved long before
it's 1994 copyright date. The fact the credits thank Dino De Laurentiis
suggest that possibly this was one of a number of late 1980s movies he
made that were shelved after his company went bankrupt. This wouldn't
be
the first time - witness Collision Course and Rampage.
(By
the way, the credits also thank "Ivan the Cat" as Storybook Artist -
suggesting
that at least one person saw how bad this movie was.)
Check for availability on Amazon (VHS)
Check for availability on Amazon (DVD)
See also: For Your Height Only,
Highway To Hell, Troll 2
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